The main objection we get around listening is that it takes too long! It’s true that simply telling someone what to do is quicker – but since there is about one in ten chance that what you say is actually being heard, perhaps the maths doesn’t add up the way you may hope. Great listening […]
Creating time for listening Read More »
Our success isn’t about us. It’s about working with others to get THEM outcomes and solve THEIR problems. We achieve our own success as a result of that. That means less about you, more about them. It means listening to understand and show curiosity, not listening to speak and tell. It means stepping into their
Stepping into some new shoes Read More »
Professor Sir Mansel Aylward, Director of the Centre for Psychosocial and Disability Research and Professor of Public Health Education in the School of Medicine at Cardiff University talks about “On the Front Foot”. The ability to get along with, and influence, others is the single most important skill in business and in life. This book
Talking On The Front Foot Read More »
Our brains rely on shortcuts that simplify a hectic world. One shortcut is: “if there’s a reason, it must be valid”. When we hear or read “because” or “that’s why” it signals to our brain – hey, all good, there’s a reason. A famous study sent a researcher to a library with a copy machine.
It’s just because … nudging with reasons Read More »
You’ve tried to do the right thing – you’ve listened and now it’s your turn. You’re giving advice or instructions and now it’s the other person who isn’t hearing you! What on earth is happening and why is getting through taking so long. Here are the top three reasons that others might switch off. Unclear
A lot of us choose to avoid confrontation. This means that we avoid sharing our thoughts, and can be seen as not moving fast enough, hedging our bets or not saying what we plan to do. On the other hand, there is the person who loves to confront, to challenge and to win an argument
The Gentle Art of Disagreeing Read More »
Imagine you’re late for a job interview. Your interview. Everyone is waiting for you … And you have forgotten to charge your phone. It’s dead and you’re in an unfamiliar location. As you make your way down what you hope is the right street, it starts to rain. There goes your chance of making a
How your mind plays tricks on you Read More »
The line up at the coffee counter was out the door. We were all after our starter fuel for the day. Just in front was one of those big orders that was being taken back to the office – a solid mix of macchiato, long black, mochaccino and the like. As I was waiting I
The best things in life are free Read More »
We’ve all been there. We’ve just presented a great argument – we are all on the same page. And then we hear it: “This makes sense. I just need to discuss this with __________ So, it’s ok that they discuss it, it’s just, if you’d known, you would have taken a different tack. Fortunately, from
Who’s Making the Decision? Read More »
You’ve got numbers to make and the deadline is fast approaching. Pressure builds and what started as a desire for outcomes starts to become a hint of desperation. You start to push and tell, you start to become needy and, well, desperate. Your client can sense it – and they pull right back. In a
Be understated for influence Read More »
